5 Worst Mascots in the MLB

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Another article by Jack Nuckols.

Mascots. A staple for baseball games (almost) everywhere. And while some mascots are great (and we’ll go over that next week), others suck. Here is the 5 worst mascots in the MLB.

5) Billy Marlin- Marlins

This one was a little debatable, because unlike the others on the list, he makes sense. But here’s the thing: Mascot’s heads can’t be plastic. It’s just creepy. I get that it’s a fish, and fish don’t have fur, but neither do triceratops (Rockies). The name is also hard to understand, and not even that clever (BILLy Marlin). Not great. D

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4) D.Baxter- Diamondbacks

Can we go over what a diamondback is? It is a snake, not a bobcat. And it isn’t even like they chose the bobcat cause he looks inviting. For whatever reason, he doesn’t have eyes and looks more scary than he does fun. At least the name’s cool. D-

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3) Slider- Cleveland Indians

What is this? Please, tag the Indians and ask them what on God’s green earth they wanted this to be. I’d make a pun, but it looks like nothing, and certainly doesn’t correspond with the Indians name. I beg you, Indians, change your mascot. F+

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2) Southpaw- White Sox

Before I go any further, I will give the name credit. Seeing as they are on the Southside of Chicago, it fits well. BUT…who thought that a massive booger was a good mascot? Can you imagine how terrifying he is to little kids?

Look at this photo — that kid can not possibly be having any fun. Just look at those eyes! F+

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1) Homer the Brave- Atlanta Braves

This is the lowest of the low. It is essentially an off-brand Mr. Met. And may I point out that if it weren’t for his tenure, Mr. Met would be right up there with Homer. But Mr. Met was the first true mascot and Homer was not. I mean let’s be completely honest, humanized baseballs are weird, and even weirder with eye black. At least the other mascots on this list were made with some sense of creativity or corresponded to the team. Homer gets an F for creativity, F for creepiness, F for name (it’s at the bottom of the barrel), and F for keeping with the team name (it sure isn’t a Brave) Overall: F-

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Angels Game? Here are tips (and some criticism)

This stadium consistently delivers one of the highest attendance rates in the MLB – and we have no idea why. Yes, Mike Trout is worth seeing, but that’s just about it. The crowd isn’t into the game, the scoreboard is tiny, and the seats aren’t great.

Start here with this free guide that will help you get the most out of any baseball experience.

How to get there

Los Angeles traffic is always rough. The good news is that no one comes to the game on time or stays until the end. So there isn’t quite the massive surge you experience at other parks. We’d recommend parking in the huge Angels parking lot and doing your best to get a spot that is close to an exit out.

Where to sit

Outfield seats are tough, because you can’t see the scoreboard. First and third base seats are better, but they’re angled in a way that makes you shift sideways to watch the batter. We would recommend cheap seats behind home plate – preferably in the shade.

What to eat

The food here is an embarrassment. It’s nothing you won’t find at the food court in any mall. Get a hot dog and peanuts.

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Detroit Tigers Tips

This is a big, beautiful coliseum of a park that is a tribute to baseball. From the giant tiger statues at the entrance, to the field, to the view…everything has a sense of grandeur.

Tip #1: Download our guide.

How to get there

Parking isn’t tough in Detroit, and both Route 75 and 375 are right there. We would recommend finding a lot (or even street parking) a little further away from the park with easy entrance onto the highway. Plus, there are plenty of scalpers along your route, if you want to get tickets that way.

Where to sit

Would not recommend the lower deck seats. They’re angled a little weird and they don’t have the best crowd. The real fans are up in the higher levels. Upper deck behind home plate or on the third-base side give you a perfect view of the game and you can see the Detroit skyline right behind the park.

What to eat

Food here is nothing special, but the prices aren’t as outrageous as other park.

 

 

 

Cardinals Baseball — We can help you do it right.

Don’t wait! Download our free stadium guide!

The history and tradition of the Cardinals are ingrained into every detail of this stadium design. The addition of the new venue, Cardinal Nation, adds to the entertainment factor. The fans are the best: they watch the game, understand the game, cheer for an excellent play, and applaud an injured player, even on the opposing team.

How to get there

There is ample garage parking at the ballpark, but it is a zoo, traffic-wise. You can also take the light rail, but that can be a zoo getting on your train when the game is over. If you are spending the night in St. Louis, you can’t beat staying at one of the nearby hotels and walking to the ballpark.

Where to sit

Most seats are terrific. But if you sit on the first base side or behind home plate, you get a view of the arch over the field.

What to eat

Food is fine, but unimaginative. And prepare to miss the action when you go get food.

 

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(Photo courtesy of our Senior Correspondents.)

Twins Game Guide

This stadium is totally different from any other park. The stone walls and the skyline make this a really unique experience. It’s worth spending some time wandering around the park a little between innings (and there’s a decent chance you can “upgrade” seats as the game goes on).

How to get there

Target Field is truly in downtown Minneapolis, so there are plenty of parking options nearby. If you’re in town overnight, it’s pretty easy to either walk to the park or get a hotel shuttle.

Where to sit

There aren’t any bad seats in the park – it’s well designed for watching baseball. We’d recommend behind home plate or third base side. That way you can see the scoreboard, see the downtown skyline, and see the old school neon Twins sign in the outfield.

What to eat

There’s a fun range of foods to try here – everything from Indian to gourmet burgers. The polish sausages and cheese curds are a local treat, so maybe get that. It’s worth taking your time and exploring the options here.

Beyond that…dress warm and download our stadium guide!

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SF Giants game tips and tricks

This is a stunning park. McCovey Cove is right there and you can see the Bay Bridge over left field. It’s easy to get around inside and every seat feels super close, so the crowd and players have a sense of intimacy unlike any other park. It has a mixed crowd of really fun fans and rich tech people who don’t know baseball.

How to get there

Walk. You’re crazy if you try and drive.

Where to sit

Three preferred options. 1) Left field bleachers are incredibly close to the action and they’re pretty cheap. But you can’t see the scoreboard. 2) Field level, third base side and you are right near where the opposing pitcher warms up – lots of good-natured heckling. 3) Splurge and get K Zone tickets (Section AR151, Row 1) and you can flip over giant Ks when Giants pitchers get strikeouts.

Batting practice

Lots of bleacher space, good chance at getting a ball. Except…there is a whole legion of loser adults trying to get balls during BP.

What to eat

Gilroys Garlic Fries are a must. Then follow up with a Ghirardelli sundae. The food here is really good. So is the beer.

 

 

Tampa Bay Rays – Here are some tips

This is the worst ball park on the list – by a lot. It’s worse than most minor league parks. The fake turf looks worn and awful. Everything echoes weirdly in a way that makes the place feel extra empty. Plus this team has almost no history to be excited about.

First tip: Download this guide for free!

How to get there

There’s plenty of parking nearby — although getting there is a bit of a slog.

Where to sit

Sit on the lower decks just about anywhere and you’ll be really close to the field. Almost shockingly close. And because there’s almost no one there, you can move around at will and spread out.

What to eat

Food here is nothing special, but you literally have to go underground into a tunnel to get to it.

Gaze in wonder at this subpar stadium:

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